I heard him moan.
“S’matter, Pookie Bear?” I call him “Pookie Bear”, sometimes. Don’t tell him I mentioned this.
“I can’t find the two tape measures. I know I returned them BOTH to you.”
See, I have tools, and he’s permitted to use them, the only caveat being he is required to put them back where he got them from or he will die a hideous death.
“Then that’s where they are. Did you look there?”
With irritation, he snapped, “I said I returned them to you, and yes, I looked there.”
‘k. So I got up, went to where they were supposed to be, and there they were. Both of them. The orange one, and the purple one.
I grabbed ’em both and met him as he was coming back in from the garage, despondently.
His eyes got big. “Where were they?”
“Where they belong.”
“I looked there.”
I know. That’s why I looked there, too. I mean, hello.